Just Like Riding a Bike....

Yesterday I started the adventure of teaching my youngest son (Landon) to ride his bike without training wheels. I was pumped as we got him all set up with his helmet and pads on the park grass. But what started as a Norman Rockwell "Dad Moment" quickly turned into a "How can I get my hands on some anti-depressants" moment.

Landon who is usually our resident dare devil was overcome with fear of falling off his bike. After a few trys and falls he had decided he didn't want to try any more. His mantra became I can't do it!" I tried every motivating statement, every bribe, EVERYTHING...... but he would not be moved. After an hour of "I can't".....I decided to pack it up again and try again tomorrow. Some lessons I walked away with:

• I can't make my son succeed. I can only provide an environment where he can.
• As a Dad I must model patience and love when my kids fail.
• When I think about how many times I've told God "I can't" and He has met me in that place with patience and mercy. I'm incredibly grateful.

I'll keep you up to date with the bike lessons,

Nathan

Nathan

She.....

Almost 24 hours ago I sat across from a woman at dinner that continues to captivate me without her even knowing it. There is no presumption on her part. She is only herself and has never tried to be another someone. She is the quintessential version of what I never knew I always wanted. She doesn't know that I sometimes just watch her mouth when she speaks. Her eyes, always sincere, add more to her words (which need no assistance) but assist them all the more. She makes me smile. She is the gift from God to the man I wish I always was. She sees my flaws and yet loves still. She sees my quarks and yes, laughs. She sees my pain and endures with me.

She takes my breath and heart away...and I bid them adieu for I am a better man with them in her possession.

She is my wife.

He's Already Been There....

Have you ever felt like your life was two steps away from greatness as well as two steps away from all of the wheels coming off the train at the same time? I tend to feel this way often. Before you diagnose me as being "Manic Depressive" let me explain.

Depending on the circumstances in my marriage, family, friendships and ministry; I really can end up feeling a wide range of emotions. As the victories and losses of our lives ebb and flow we can all find ourselves overcome with the feelings of excitement and euphoria to the depths of anxiety and grief. It is vital that we make the truth of God's word our compass; a fixed "True North" for our souls. Without it our emotions can spin out of control and it can lead us to make erratic decisions as well allow us to go to some very dark places in our hearts and minds.

Quick Question: Did you know that God is not restricted by time?

"He is the Alpha and Omega, The Beginning and The End". He sees and knows all things. He knows our thoughts and words even before we speak them. He has already been to the end of your situation. He's seen the outcome. There are no surprises for God. Bottom Line: We can take comfort in knowing that our 'future' that seems at times so scary and daunting for us; is already God's present. He's already been there and got the t-shirt.

Trust Him,

Nathan

When Today isn't Enough.....

Recently I had the opportunity to catch up with an old friend and find out how his life was going. He shared with me that he was going to make another huge leap in furthering his academic studies. When I asked him why, he said, "I need an external mental and emotional push. It's either this or have an affair. I chose the least expensive option."

I can resonate with my friend's feeling of always wanting that "next big thing". I can become so forward thinking that I forget about today. And that next big thing is always elusive. It seems just as we arrive and accomplish that project, event or attain that "next ring", we find that the satisfaction disappears in our souls like cotton candy on the tongue. This constant striving left unchecked can cause us to live life like a bull in a china closet.

I have been on this roller coaster of emotions and it's not fun. I'm slowly growing in my ability to manage my emotions instead of my emotions managing me. For the sake of my marriage, my family and my ministry it is crucial that I get this right. Bottom line: I must remind myself daily that my life's pursuit is not to attain greatness for myself, but to point to Christ's greatness.

Today is Enough,

Nathan

Motives....

I'm back people!!!! Well, I'm back today. You might have noticed my last entry was Aug. 2ND. Let me explain......I had a stark realization about myself.....and it wasn't a fun one to publicize but for the sake vulnerability and transparency here goes:

I realized that somewhere along the way in my desire to influence people through writing I began to love the feedback even more than the writing itself. I would constantly check to see if someone had "thought it was good" or "insightful". I'd check to see how many people had visited my blog or became followers. Then one night I could smell it. It was the pungent.....oderous smell of pride. That's the smell of wanting people to approve of me and my effort to seek out "kudos" from people. What started out as a great tool to influence people for good, turned into something that was influencing me for the bad.

Proverbs 16:2
All the ways of a man are clean in his own sight,
But the LORD weighs the motives.
NASU

The Lord weighed my motives and reminded me that HE is my supreme value.

So I'm back for now and asking Jesus to help me to continue to walk in humility so that I bring Him glory rather than be a hinderance to myself or others.

Missed you,

Nathan

A Glass of Water.....

This afternoon my doorbell rang. I answered the door with some annoyance, knowing that it was most likely a salesman. It was. His name was Rob. He was a 20 year old exchange student from the U.K. selling children's educational books. He asked if he could come in and share with me what he was selling. I told him "No thank you"as I began to shut the door. I immediately felt led by the Lord to open my door and to let him in. I said, "You know what? Why don't you come in after all." Rob grabbed his bag and came inside. I asked him to sit at my dining room table. "Can I get you some water?", I asked. He said, "Sure, That would be great." I went into the kitchen where my wife was studying. She asked who it was and I told her, I don't know, I just felt like I was supposed to invite him in.
I went back into the dining room to give Rob his water to find him crying. He said, "I don't know why I'm crying." I said, "It's OK.......Rob, I'm a pastor and I felt like I was supposed to ask you in. Can I pray for you?" For the next hour I had the wonderful privilege of sharing the gospel with Rob. He was incredibly receptive and I could feel the presence of the Lord with us as we spoke. I believe I had the opportunity to not only share my faith through verbally expressing but through practical kindness as well. There was a seed planted today that I'm praying someone else will water and reap. After a couple of glasses of water later our time together concluded. As he was leaving I encouraged him to drop me a line on Facebook and that I would be praying for him.

Bottom Line: We must allow for life interruptions so that we can embrace the joy of sharing our faith in word AND deed.

Are you Thirsty,

Nathan

Your Local Weather Man....

The last few days have been that kind of storm that the weather man some how missed. I'm sure, like me, you've experienced circumstances and storms that catch you off guard. I'm encouraged and strengthened by the knowledge that I'm not walking this journey alone.

A few things I think are worth learning during these times:

1. There is ALWAYS TIME TO PRAY! (You'll "feel" and make things worse if you don't.)

2. No matter how much you "don't feel like it", READ YOUR BIBLE! It is our compass, our true north as it were when it feels like our life is spinning. We need more truth, not more feelings in crisis. (Psalms 46 is a good start.)

3. Don't believe that you have to be depressed because you encounter something heart breaking. Grieve....yes. Harbor it....no.

4. Make it a point to not make any major decisions when feeling overwhelmed. (Unless absolutely necessary).

5. Make sure you are eating right and getting plenty of rest.

6. Remember you can't fix people and fix every circumstance. STOP CARRYING THAT RESPONSIBILITY. THE GOD position is currently filled.

7. Get off your computer now and practice doing number 1.



I mean it....Off,

Nathan